Cheryl & Shiva

Shiva's Arms

Jennifer Kumar on Shiva's Arms

I admit, reading novels has been challenging for me over the years. However, when the novel straddles real life to the point of complete belief, leaving me thinking, "Yeah, this really can happen in real life," I am sucked in!

Being sucked in, not once, but thrice, was easy with Cheryl Snell's recount of the struggles and joys of living in a cross-cultural, interfaith and bicultural family in the novel, Shiva's Arms.

It doesn't hurt that I can personally relate to many of the joys and struggles faced by the characters:

- Being ''coached" by friends, family, and even my spouse in how to behave 'more Indian': what to say, not say, what to wear, what and how to cook particular foods, what to do or not do for particular festivals or occasions, etc. There are two examples I would like to share from the book:

(1) Alice sets a Shiva statue in the kitchen. Ram pulls it out, offended and disgusted, telling Alice 'it doesn't belong in the kitchen where it's impure.' Of course, Ram has no reason as to why this is so. These kinds of situations are a 'dime a dozen' in India; people being told to do this or not do that because 'it's our culture,' but not having any reason behind it or offering alternative solutions. This is a frustrating part for many foreigners (including Indians born and raised outside India) to Indian culture to 'get used to', if in fact, there is any 'getting used to it.' This increases the push-pull, clear like and confusing disdain at time for a foreign culture. (More below!)

(2) Another aspect of this cross-cultural coaching that is even more challenging, in my opinion is being coached on how to tell jokes to "Indians" or appreciating the humor in Indian's jokes. There are a few instances in the book where Alice tries to tell jokes, that turn out to be inappropriate for Indian crowds and Ram pulls her away very quickly. I can completely relate to these situations and I guess without them no cross-cultural narrative would be complete or completely believable!

- Feeling I am putting my spouse or his family 'between two worlds' when trying to bring friends together from the "American" side or the "Indian" side. I was moved and memories of similar episodes from my life flashed in my head when I read the recount of 'Alice's first home-cooked Indian dinner party for friends' starting on page 29.

- The wonder, excitement and overwhelming chaos that ensues at an Indian wedding (any wedding for that matter can be equally chaotic, but when an American is a bride or bridegroom at an Indian wedding, and it's a new experience, it's more overwhelming, confusing and exciting, especially if done abroad). What a better opening to the story and novel than this scene! It will immediately draw anyone in. I could feel for Alice when her mood shifted, especially because rather than being 'coached' through the episode, she was basically picked up and moved through the scene like a small girl retelling a story with her dolls. Alice was at the complete mercy of her new in-laws.

- The on-going acceptance or repulsion of being intertwined in another 'culture'. I have read, written and reflected on the idea of 'culture shock.' In many of the writings, the reader is led to believe that culture shock is a linear process, and once 'certain things' are learnt and adapted by the newcomer, the culture shock is overcome. I don't believe this is accurate. Even if we live in the same country our whole life, if we assume that, we would not change and grow. In different times of our lives we experience different things which compel us to like or be repelled by the same things. This is clearly shown in the book- Alice's push-pull love with Indian culture, always having a love for it, but sometimes being clearly repulsed. The two clear examples would be:

(1) When Amma comes to U.S. the first time, talks only in Tamil in the home (she doesn't know much, if any English) and turns the home into a 'tiny India', making it, I think a bit foreign to Alice, and Alice exclaims, "All right, fair's fair. I wanna show you guys some American culture now. There's a play I wanna take you to. Come on, now. Let's go." This scene reminds me vividly of some of my frustrations living in India, being over stimulated by the Indian culture and at times over-emphasizing some of my "American-ness" as I felt it was not really 'allowed' to do so. Or, it reminds me of how in America it is very possible and realistic that even in one's own home, it's possible to live a different culture inside the four walls of a home that is completely different from the outside world. I am sure immigrants from all backgrounds can relate to this. In such situations, stepping outside the house is like living in a foreign land! Of course, in the novel, we find out Alice gives birth soon after her almost 'psychotic break' at the play. It may seem over dramatic because it is a fast-paced novel after-all, but in some ways, to me such a scene seems completely possible.

(2) Near the end of the book, Alice comes to terms with her mother-in-law through nursing her back to health in this time; she has in-law staying in the home helping her. One of the 'tasks' given to the in-laws by Alice is to have Amma tell them stories, and they translate them from Tamil to English so she (Alice) can draw narrations to refresh Amma about her life's memories. In this exchange, Amma opens up and tells personal stories about her life she has not told anyone.

There are many, many more points I can highlight in the wonders of 'Shiva's Arms' and why I recommend anyone interested in cross-cultural family life, Indian culture, American culture, Hindu culture or any of the other subjects in the book to pick up this book devour it. I say 'devour' because reading this book is so engrossing, even at my third read I am engrossed as my first. It is also possible to read this book in less than a day because it is indeed so engrossing. So, unlike other novels that you may find it impossible to pass the first few pages or chapters, I really don't believe it would happen with this one! Looking for some really great summer-time reading? Pick up this book, go sit under a tree in the summer shade or by the lake or ocean and while soaking up the summer breezes, soak up the wonderful narratives in Shiva's Arms. I guarantee you won't be disappointed.

Show Me Your Shiva

...and win a limited edition linocut by Janet. Just take a photo of yourself holding a copy of Cheryl's novel Shiva's Arms and post it on her Facebook Event page HERE or send it to shivasarms43@yahoo.com to register for the drawing. It's our way of launching the Shiva's Arms Virtual Book Tour! Be there or be square!

Discounted

22% off Cheryl's bodacious hardback,Shiva's Arms, today at Amazon. Bad for her, good for you!

Blog Tour Boogie

Fun

Here's something fun--Storycasting.com. It's a site that lets you fantasy-cast your novel with actors, and argue the merits of your choices with other folks. People use it as part of their virtual book launches. Cheryl played around with the cast of her novel, Shiva's Arms, and came up with THIS.

If you'd like a turn, here's the backstory on Cheryl's characters:

1. Alice. Wife, daughter-in-law, and depressive, she's the perpetual unsuitable bride.
2. Ram. The quintessential man in the middle, caught between his wife and mother.He runs away from his Hindu culture as fast as Alice runs toward it.
3. Amma. Matriarch of a Brahmin joint-family, she must either reconcile herself to the culture clash with which her son has presented her or protect tradition, at any cost.
4.Sambashivan, Ram's free-thinking father. “You must marry soon,” he says when Ram goes off to graduate school in America. “Otherwise, marriage will be for companionship only.”
5. Sam, the only child of Ram and Alice, the favorite of Amma, who sees in him a new beginning, a chance to rewrite her son’s saga until history threatens to repeat itself.
6.Nela, the disgraced daughter, ostracized for a small romantic indiscretion.Her accidental freedom is threatened under the weight of family need.
7. Nigel, an aging self-absorbed musician with whom Nela is romantically linked. He stumbles upon a situation where it’s easier to betray Nela than to lose his daughter to her nephew Sam.

Message from the Publisher

TWEET US your funniest/most memorable cooking experience with your mother-in-law, and win one of two free copies of Shiva's Arms.Contest closes 4-30-10. 8pm EST

Good luck!

What's Cheryl's novel Shiva's Arms about, anyway?

From a seemingly simple clash of cultures between in-laws, Shiva’s Arms evolves into an exploration of freedom and the ties that bind, love and duty. Written in a lyrical style studded with startling imagery, the author uses South Indian myths and customs to explore questions of belonging--national, cultural, linguistic--as well as class and ideology. Life is breathed into very different characters, giving them each the space in which to tell their story.

Alice marries Ramesh, a man from a tradition she can’t fathom. Ram aspires to the modern way of life. Alice, eager to belong, embraces the culture her husband is trying to leave behind. At the beginning, even her wardrobe is like a costume--“She jangled an armload of gold-painted bangles…Her eyes were lined with kohl… Every time she took a step, an ankle- bracelet of little bells tinkled.” Alice is an "insider" who wants out; an "outsider" to the West, Ram wants in.

But Alice is the outsider in her mother-in-law’s mind. The old woman will protect family traditions at any cost, whether in India or on US soil. Alice’s authority in her own home is constantly challenged. Amma re-decorates at will, imposes Hindu rituals on the household, and since a child belongs to the whole family, indoctrinates her grandson, Sam, with Indian traditions. As the namesake of the god of creation and destruction, Amma Shiva both embraces and repels, emotionally destabilizing the fragile Alice, who seeks refuge in clinical depression.

Also in Alice’s world is Ram’s sister Nela, a brilliant, beautiful woman rendered un-marriageable by a romantic indiscretion. When she makes her bid for freedom, Amma disowns her, and forbids the extended family to ever speak her name again. Alice keeps up with her anyway, by telephone and mail. “She writes to me often, with news of the boy and my brother, always with plans for a trap for my mother,” Nela explains to Nigel, her longtime lover, as they sift through the latest photos of Sam.

The boy has grown up believing his aunt is dead. When he discovers the truth, he storms out to go to Nela, and shifts the power between Alice and the old woman. Amma’s health fails, and stripped to her essence, she must depend on Alice. With the help of the dishonored daughter, Alice does her duty with tenacity and ingenuity. She restores Amma to health, and in the process, heals herself.

“Samsara,” is a word that builds resonance throughout this book. This domestic sea, part of the endless cycle of birth and death, means different things to each of the characters: to Ram and Nela it is a trap, to Alice and Amma, community. But the struggle between the religious and the secular, the traditional and the modern is best exemplified by Amma Shiva, who sets the tone for a household in which relationships mean everything. That is what ultimately draws Alice in. In Shiva’s Arms, the theme of religion shows how one family uses it to care for one another in an unpredictable world.

Shiva's Arms, the trailer

Here's a taste of Cheryl's NOVEL.